21 March 2009

Living in gratitude 31: swimming between the flags

Yesterday afternoon I received the phone call from Institut Marie Curie. I will be hospitalised either this coming Monday afternoon or Wednesday... this will be confirmed late Monday morning. This means I start radiotherapy the following day, so, either Tuesday or Thursday...

I must admit, my heart sank when I got the call from Institut Marie Curie... I really thought I had another week up my sleeve to rest and get healthier...

Furthermore, having a call from them is a reality check "you do have cancer which needs to be cured by a very particular treatment". This last week I haven't even uttered the word 'cancer' and instead focused every thought on my mantra to living now + that is "I need to be as healthy as possible on every level : emotionally, mentally, physically, psychologically, spiritually."

Having the radiotherapy be brought 'somewhat forward' is another adjustment. Another reminder of how I have no control of this situation : all I can do is take really good care of every thought, every action, every thing I eat, keep up my meditation, sleep well... and surrender the outcome.

My friend stuart in melbourne referred my approach to my daily living as learning to "swim between the flags" (this is a very Australian metaphor for swimming at the beach, where the flags mark the safe zone for swimming + where life-savers are watching over...).

Slept 12 hours last night... that felt really, really good. A friend told me that in Ancient Egypt, when people were healing, they would make them sleep 12-14 hours a day, as the sleep was when the healing was taking place.

Here is the folly in the park in front of my appartment.


Kym said...

Hey Nat...agree with the whole swimming between the flags metaphor and also that sleep is a great healer...however, we should try to avoid mixing these metaphors - I seem to remember sleeping on the beach was not a partic. smart idea! lol...be present and take care of each moment...Kym xx

Anonymous said...

Nathalie chan sleep is sweet sleep heals and there are no sharks between the flags. You are protected. We are protecting you with the cosmic energy that you offer to us.